Thursday...May 22, 2008

Not much happened on Thursday. We were to meet up at the Caferaga Medrese at 1 o'clock, so I woke up later than usual. Which was fun :D

Thursday morning and afternoon were nice, spent at the Caferaga Medrese where we sat and talked about our readings and experiences and observations and everything. It was fun. Thursday evening, however, is an entirely different story. Even though I'm writing this blog post almost 2 weeks after that Thursday, I remember my feelings like it happened just a minute ago.

I went to Eyup. To Ummi Sinan Dergah. There was supposed to be a zikr there, and I was going to get to see a lot of people that I knew and it would all be in one place and so it would help me avoid a lot of phone traffic and kontor loss (kontor is like minutes in America, the more you talk the more kontor you lose, and you buy kontor so that you have minutes to talk). And I had the best evening and night of my life.

It's amazing how a tiny little place when used right can fit so many people. How the walls can echo your voice back at you even though everywhere is full to the brim with people and there's no space left for your voice to bounce back. How one man's singing, another's breathing, and especially one woman's energy can take you up and away...I miss that night. I wish it were possible to go back and relive the past. I wish especially to go back to that night. I honestly don't have the words to describe it. I don't have any idea what to call the feelings I had while listening and how I was when I left...I didn't want to leave...I'd found another home, and it had embraced me. I felt everyone important to me was there with me, even though they were thousands of miles away, with an ocean in between us. But that didn't matter. They were there, next to me, surrounding me, embracing me. I knew then that I would never be alone.

I guess that was one of those nights where you have to live it to understand it. I'm really happy that I was a part of the fortunate people who lived it, and hopefully I will be a part of those who continue to live it now.

After that wonderful evening that went well into the night, I was taken home by a friend of my father's and his wife and brother. Before going home however, we all went to a restaurant that does very good and clean iskembe corba. I was only able to handle a couple spoons of that, but it was really very good. But I think my chi or something was off-balance after the evening, so I wasn't all that up to eating something like iskembe. After the corba though we got kulbasti, which was very edible to me because it came with french fries and rice and veggies and whatnot, so I had a very nice time. After that, my dad's friend took me home, and I slept.

No pictures included in this post because none were taken. Of my evening at the Ummi Sinan Dergah, I didn't want to disrespect the reader by offering only a snapshot that doesn't tell you anything. My only prayer would be that you have an experience like this as well. Wonderful doesn't even begin to cover anything. Marvelous is the same. Mystic doesn't even get close. Simply put--that evening was. And is. And will continue to be.